Encourage Not Discourage

Happiness is a matter of choice. It has been said to us over and over again. Should we believe that or not? It seems like such a simple statement, yet it can change your day from a pessimistic scowl to a light hearted smile. Can you do it? Is it possible, even if you have been thrown bad news? If you’re a positive person, stay great. If you’re a negative thoughts first person, then I can only suggest that you try. I can advise that no matter which way your day goes, to not let anyone discourage you in your life.

Life is truly what you make it to be. It is your decision whether to have a bad day or a good one. Do you want pajama day with ice cream and consistently thinking about worrisome things, or do you want to get out and try to enjoy this one life you have? I do understand that it can be difficult. Disappointments alter our days whether we consciously or unconsciously. How many times do you just feel like staying in bed or the couch and just binge watch? I am guilty of that too.

What happens when you are the opposite? You are up early and prepare for a wonderful day. Make your mini calls or texts to people to say hello. Some you may have plans with and some are for a little catch up. It has its pros and cons. In my experience the same situation happens every time. Girlfriends come and go, but my Matty and John (after over 25 and 35 years) are still my friends, through think and thin, and they know that I’m there ASAP if they need me. Girlfriends seem to bring competition and discouragement and disappointments. After so many chances I cannot get it right.

I do have one exception, Abigail. After a number of years she’s still my friend. We haven’t seen each other in months (she’s a mom with 2 children) but I’m not offended, yet grateful. I do have a few women friends that are wonderful women, unfortunately they live hundreds of miles away. Unless someone gets on a plane it’ll be a while before I see them. I am not offended, I understand. They bring me joy via phone or text or email. My disappointments are the women who proclaim friendship that are in close proximity of me. They sing a good song, but then disappear. After a number of times I have become immune to their false statements.

We as adults do not need nor deserve to be in a circle of people who discourage, demean, condescend, compete or anything else. We are all wonderful in our own way.

If you feel or believe that someone, man or woman is discouraging you and not encouraging you, then it may be time to take stock of your friendship circle. I had to faze out and delete people and I feel fabulous for doing it. I wish them all well but it was and is time to move on to the next chapter of my life.

I am grateful for my small group of friends, small family and self work. Never stop learning new ways to improve the inner peace inside you. That is my anchor, keeping my inner peace. As long as I have that I can provide myself with encouragement anytime I need it. That is a lovely feeling.

How do you do it? Are you at a point in your life where your circle encourages you? Do not expect anything less. You deserve much more.

Peace to you all ✌️



  1. Love this! Thank you so much for sharing.
    It’s great to be an encourager and to encourage others. Praise God, I am in a circle where encouragement is key to all we do.
    Be blessed and keep up the good work!
    Hayley 😊💕

    Liked by 1 person

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